bangbanggobbledygook

i am not done with my modern prose and i'm falling asleep! zzzzzonk.

didn't present for gp in the end today so i went for nothing! left early for the polyclinic after gp and was there for an entire two hours plus.
going to the doctor's and waiting by oneself is quite a lonely experience.
but what to do. my mother says that we're big girls already and should learn to take care of ourselves independently before we can take care of our younger siblings.(who, by the way don't listen to us at all.) platitude!

i am getting quite pizzed because they're taking FOREVER to heal. troublesome, itchy, gross (like i totally need you to point that out to me, hur.)gauze and tape keep running out. i am going to get angstier if they don't recover soon!zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

arghhhhhhhhh the itch on my legs and arm is frustrating me to no end!!!!!!
if i don't scratch it's so itchy
if i scratch all my skin will peel and become raw arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
DAMN ITCHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY LA.

acckkkkkk i hate the disappointment that comes with false hope.it's like giving me a trampolin and removing it after i jump.if you haven't decided, keep neutral. don't put things into my head.i feel as much as i think yknow!

i still love youall to pieces but please don't do things like that again!

Beijing fixes its Chinglish

hahaha Pockmarked Tofu, you want?

yay smint!

Lots of mutants appreciate their powers, but you'd give yours up in a second for a chance at a normal life. You're friendly and considerate, but you'd rather blend in with the crowd than stand out and get attention. Like Rogue, your sense of touch is extremely powerful, so even holding hands is a huge deal for you. You're deeply afraid of hurting the people you love, so you tend to push them away when things get too intense.

You're Vanilla.
You're as popular and relaxing as vanilla ice cream. You go with the flow, and get along with all sorts of people. You appreciate peace and simplicity, so you sometimes find crowds and loud noises overwhelming. You are a chilled-out, calming influence on the people in your life, and your friends appreciate how supportive and flexible you are.

You're a duckling!
Aww... right now we're dying for a special web browser that lets us reach through the Internet and pat your fluffy little feathers. Someday, you're going to grow up into a big duck and migrate back and forth between two homes (that's right -- not only will you be able to fly, you'll take extended vacations every year in a warm southern climate). As a baby duck, though, your life's not quite as luxurious. Some baby animals get to snuggle up to mom and take it easy until they get used to the world, but ducklings can swim and feed themselves as soon as they hatch. The mama duck basically leads them to water and says, "OK, do your thing." Please take care of yourself, OK? The world is counting on your cuteness.

HAHAH BEEEP i can't swim quack.
smint do more fun quizzes so i can copy you!

ooh the weather is too good to be true. i hope there'll be a thunderstorm later into the night..perfect for tucking yourself into bed!

aiyo i am so slowww alamak. when i (attempt to) do work, i stare, stone, stare.terrible. at this rate i'll need another 5 years before i can sit for the As.

priscilla add oil add oil! :D

today i lost and found my ezlink card, today it looked like the deatheaters were coming to get us in the morning, today i got splashed by tau huey zhui, today we did batik painting (which the boys were ohsoserious about), today i had kfc with smint and a talk about boys and girls and how we don't know people.

I AM STILL FULL FROM LUNCH.

anyway i am happy that mugger khoo asked if we wanted to play for ihc.
anyway i am now using my 630-10 time more efficiently with daily vocab and more. 500 for yu le bai fen bai 600 for zack and cody the suite life. they make me laugh! oh and i am still liking panweibo!cos you can tell from his mannerisms that he's real and funny and normal and cool. no body like kwon's, no looks like edison's, but i still like!

i wish i didn't know i wish i didn't see i wish i could turn it back i wish i didn't wish i could turn it back,
you don't know.

probably one of those few times when i can't figure even myself out.

ughhh priscilla gan. sometimes i dislike the things i think SO MUCH. i think i know what is the cause but i am too wimpy to say it out loud cos saying it out loud gives it some sort of concrete confirmation that only thinking it doesn't. it is so wrong and so petty but i still can't help thinking it. worse still i actually know what it is. and doubly worse still i know it's all my doing. and triply worse still i still feel so indignant and scared and green and blue and purple and red and SCARED.

and hellooo it is not a tv addiction. someone told me that i have no music in my life. yea but i have my tv. just like how music is your life and you all cannot live one day without your ipod, tv is my release my escape, mine. so GAH stop tsk-ing my allegiance to my television programmes.

You're corn on the cob!
You're a little bit country and a little bit messy, but in a good way. You have a relaxed, easygoing personality that reminds us of summer vacation. You're a bright, fascinating person on the inside, but sometimes, people have to get to know you (and pull away your outer layers) before they realize just how great you are. We have the strangest urge to dip you in butter and sprinkle you with salt.

i just came back from rollerblading with my 7 year old sister. i wanted to blade and so she decided to tag along with her scooter. before we left i even made extra sure that she wanted to tag along even though my mom wasn't coming with us. we were having fun-she laughing at me trying not to fall down at curbs, she the imaginary kfc chicken wing scootering as fast as she can away from me the scary monster who wants to eat her. it started drizzling so we headed home and then TADAH she started crying! i was partly flabbergasted, partly annoyed, partly amused, partly exasperated. ok i can totally understand her attachment to my mother but seriously isn't this abit over the top? my mom's at home and we're in punggol, it's not like we're in jurong or something, leh. i feel slightly upset and annoyed that she does not trust me enough to keep her safe i mean i'm her elder sister, i'm eighteen, i'm perfectly responsible, i'm nice to her, i'm tall big and strong, and if anything were to happen i'll definitely make sure it hits me first so WHY in the world is she not reassured by my presence?!

really, why ah

anyway just now i spelt curbs as kerbs. like, kebab. HO

i am watching Luxury China
and they just called Shanghai the place for China's nouvea-riche.
i am totally enticed by the opulence of uptown Shanghai

st regis' personal butlers, 8888 imperial suite with a grand piano (!), shanghai tang, nutshell art, personalised computers that take 6 months to make..wow.

oh and ice water tastes the most refreshing after teethbrushing.

lunch with candice yesterday made me very happy and somewhat relieved. so even if my qualities aren't exactly fantastic, i still can hope and aspire right? and i insist on pragmatism. no offence to all my other wonderful wonderful albeit naive friends, but experience has shown me that real life in the real world ain't so easy. but i suppose that it's great to be able to prolong childhood fantasies of happily ever afters, and continue being idealistic and hey what i wouldn't give to live like you and you and you?

cycling was really fun too haven't been to eastcoast in a gazillion light years and yesterday's weather was fantastic. night solo speed cycling is quite cool too though it was too dark even for my liking!the cyclist in front of me kept turning round to check if i was going to crash into him, oh please. and i am so proud to say that lohbaika is a really fast learner! she started off abit slow but she was cycling like a pro and leaving us in the dust in no time!

on a more depressing note, i just charted my own calendar and damn bloody scared i am.

sigh i think i will be a fantastic secretary and i should just go be one now because then i can just plan all the work for others and not do any of them myself. because that's all i almost ever do. plan plan plan but no action!besides giving others a push i'll have to give myself a harder one too!

you know how we should be thankful for even the littlest happy things in your day?
i loved today because nothing went wrong, because we went on a spontaneous wantonmee+icecream food trip, because we laughed and laughed, because we saw each other silly and childish.

and haha shulin you can compile all our funny quotes and publish a book in maybe 2o years down the road when we're old, (bald? heheh) and still laughing at each other :)

i barely went through the first page of history before i was falling asleep, switched to doing some extra research for women's equality, and ended up watching celebritea which i enjoyed very much because michellechia&shaunchen are so cute and good together that they can openly talk about farting with each other which the hosts found to be a total joke HAHA but really commendable because you have to attain a certain level of familiarity and comfortability (?) before you can do so, yes? i hope they get married soon!

i've always thought of myself as one who can accept results i cannot change with serenity. grouch, sulk and hurt inwardly i will, but i never doubt that i will still get over it and move on.

today i was on bus 13 on the way to school. and i had a sudden enlightenment. an enlightenment that nothing can be more important than this at this point in time, and that every other petty gratification can wait 3 more months. a fact that i knew in my head all this time but refused to acknowledge.this morning it just exploded in my head, everything became clear. choices, consequences, decisions, sacrifices.

the problem with me has always been changing. what i already know i can change.
i am such a square i resist change i talk to the same people i eat the same food i drink the same drink i read the same type of books i watch the same type of shows day in day out i think the same thing i go the same familiar places. no wonder.

just watched du shi da fa xian and the preview for next week's episode they're introducing this really cool sweater if you zip it all the way up to the end of the hood you'll become power ranger! cos the outisde of the hood is designed to look like a ranger's face (with your entire head and face inside the hood)HAHAH super cute! and they come in all the power ranger colours so you can choose which ranger you wanto be heheheh i wanto get one! i just tried googling for it in advance but i can't find anything on it so i'll have to wait till next tues to find out where to get one! :( i even wrote it down in my organiser so i won't forget! zomg super super super funny and cool. i think i wanto be..white ranger! or black ranger! cos they're always the coolest :D

i realised that being the middle child is a good thing. because i am an older sister to somebody i learn to always have to watch over them, look out for them, be responsible for them. yet at the same time i will always know that i have someone else who's looking out for me and i get to shirk responsibilities and act bratty once in a while. in a way i get the most out of both worlds. someone is my tree and i am somebody else's tree.

and because i have more younger siblings than older ones i learn subconsciously to be more of a person that they can depend on in order to fulfill my responsibilites as an older sister, there are always things that i've to do to sacrifice to compromise to give. and as i turn older every year i discover that there are more responsiblities and obligations that i have to learn to embrace and develop whether i like it or not.

i really didn't want two younger sisters to take away my place as the baby of the family and a share of my allowance then (probably still a little even now), but i don't think i will be the same person that i am now without my sisters. i guess that's why they say that things in life happen for a reason. oh but because my actions and attitude often revolve around my temperament, i am not always a nice sister.

i will try harder!

today has been an extraordinary day. or only because my other school days are really mundane.
anyhow HAPPY EIGHTEENTH shulin! i woke up extra early but everyone else except shulin was late, tsk!

my first friday 2 hour econs break was spent with ian talking about walruses and bears over breakfast and then we spent the second hour composing heartfelt cards to lorraine in companionable silence in the veryvery nice morning breeze under block B

break after history lecture was spent with the oh-so-hyper candice and josh and we totally forgot to go for lessons till like, 10 minutes after the bell rang

after school it was zoom home zoom bath zoom out! crazy but exhilarating and eggciting. and while waiting for the rest to arrive, i confirmed with lorraine that she already knew about the surprise and lorraine told char and i all about how she found out. and then during the time we were together i managed to reveal 2 supposed-to-be-secret surprises and later during dinner i blurted the third. SIGHHHHHHHH. but despite my inability to keep secrets successfully lorraine says that the amusing incidences of me blurting secrets will contribute to her memory of today haha! and because she looked so happy laughing away during dinner, all's good. i'm also happy haha that my radical decision turned out to be an accurate reading of her mind :D sorry if there were people who didn't feel very involved i guess it's inevitable with a big group but please know that you did help contribute to the whole rowdy, crowded feel that is required for a proper birthday celebration so thanksss!

oh and on the way to marina square i found out that Accessorize is holding a storewide 50% sale! ohmytian i need to go on a weekday soon! weekends, like tonight is too crazy and crowded.

i'm so tiredddd, TA.

yknow i am a very yay-you-replied-my-sms-or-email person. like, i really have no qualms being flooded by smses that say: Ok! to whatever i sent out because i think that it is but a necessary and appreciative gesture.
but alas! the modern society today is such that traditional individuals with ancient values and thinking are the minority and are not very assertive in the community what with all the trendy social creatures abound.

well nevermind.
this week i discovered that i'm 18! but i still have growing up to do. i'm not always what i think i am because i am not as independent of thought or as capable of separating emotions and logical thinking under stress as i thought i was. self-induced stress somemore! tsk priscilla you can balance out big stuff in life but waste your life away worrying about all the tiny details and random things that are easily resolved.

ok never mind we learn new things about ourselves everyday!
i hope tomorrow will be good! please be!

SCREAMS. !!!!!!!!!!!!! all i want is a proper place to eat WHYWHYWHY.wherewherewhere! it always boils down to the same thing isn't it. $ $ $ why can't life be easy without it?

and reading people's blogs make me wanto scream more!!i feel like harrypotter the wound hasn't healed. you don't see it do you but it hurts damnit. you're the starfish and i'm like the clam.
SCREAMS.